Just discovered an effective way to check if my mind is clean and clear: I sit in the middle of it with a big pot of white paint and a big brush and try to paint it.
The first time I tried this, there were so many lumps in my mind that it was really difficult to get a good coat of paint on it. That means that there were many, many thoughts, feelings, ideas, concepts, predispositions and dodgy motives lying around in my mind just waiting to trip me up.
As I practiced this meditation more it became easier to apply an even coat of paint. Some parts of my mind were flatter to start with than others (the back), some were easier to flatten (the sides) and some were more tricksy to deal with (the front).
I can now apply an even, teardrop-shaped coat of paint around me. Thing is, though – I don’t think my mind is any clearer. I think that the only thing that’s happened is that I’ve become more adept at using my imagination with respect to the shape of the inside of my mind. In other words, I’ve just hidden stuff away.
Still, even a small victory is still a victory in the battle to get to know my mind and bring it under some semblance of control.
Here’s to a future where me and my mind can become such good buddies that I can trust it to behave. But not today.
How’s your mind behaving these days?