Guess which movie became free to watch with Amazon Prime today. Yep, you got it – World War Z, where Z apparently means Zeke. Judging by the state of the world today, the free availability of this movies comes not a moment too soon!
So, in the spirit of helping our fellow humans, here are ten lessons me and the wife learnt from watching this epic movie:
- Always wear your seatbelt. If you’re going to need to survive an aeroplane crash that kills everybody on the plane that’s not already a Zeke then you need to be strapped in tight. Fortunately Brad Pitt and his lady companion are.
- Be observant. This is so that you can notice important signs of how the Zekes move and how they are selective about who they bite!
- Take risks. Movement is survival and so take the risk of moving towards a place of safety even if there’s danger on the route.
- Don’t be the president of the United States. Yep, you got it – he died early on in the movie.
- Don’t pull the shrapnel out. If you do that you’ll die from loss of blood because that thing goes straight in one side of your body and out the other.
- Chop off her hand, and do it super quick! If she gets bitten on her hand then that’s good advice so just hope that she doesnt get bitten anywhere else.
- Keep your phone on silent when you’re going through a whole bunch of Zekes that become super aggressive when your wife calls you to check how you’re doing.
- Be fit. You’re going to need to run and so keep those legs strong!
- Don’t keep your finger on the trigger. That’s so that if you run and trip you won’t accidentally blow your own brains out.
- Be Brad Pitt. Because, let’s face it – if you’re the starboy/girl you’re not going to die whatever happens!
There you go, that’s our quick guide to surviving a Zeke Apocalypse. We hope that some of these lessons are applicable should you happen to get caught up in any other kind of Global Pandemic. But let’s hope that you don’t. Fingers crossed.
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What happened? ๐ฏ
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no, it didn’t happen here ๐ we have to face the invasion of wild boars.
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Oh. Not quite a zombie invasion, but bad enough. I have a friend in France who has the same problem.
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wild boar is becoming a real typical dish: salami, ham, meat sauce, stew, leg, bacon … etc
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I did wonder about that. Free pork walking the street is surely too hard to resist. ๐
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Yup!!! But there are all the rules on hunting, the media pressure of animal rights activists softened by the litters and the idea that in any case one must pay a part to the state (like the King). But it is becoming a very serious problem, they come to inhabited centers, they are herds, destructive and dangerous. This is an area for hunters … and restaurants, anyway ๐
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Did I ever tell you that I follow a vegan diet? ๐
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– patapunf! –
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… but not a vegan lifestyle. ๐
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what’s the difference?
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My belt and boots. The leather ones. Get it? ๐ค
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Robert, what do I take? I already have Texan boots and amphibious boots too๐
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Cowboy boots and Wellingtons (Wellies) is what we call those here. I’ve never had the former (although I bought a pair for my dad once) but I have a pair of the latter in the garage for … erm … for keeping my feet dry when it’s wet. ๐
More information than you ever needed to know, right?
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no Wellies, but commando bots ๐ฎ
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Della folgore l’impeto ๐ค
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๐ค
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It’s the motto of the the most elite armed force in Italy. ๐ Thought it might go well with your commando boots. ๐
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๐ ๐ข๐ฅพ๐
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I’m sure I’ve never seen an Italian soldier wearing high heels.
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I am not a soldier! ๐๐ปโโ๏ธ
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Well, you never know. You could have been. I mean – the boots – that might have been a clue. ๐
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No ๐
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OK.
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I watched that movie a few years ago. Quite a creative take on it! But I hope, it won’t have to be used anytime soon!๐
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Well, yes – I hope so too. But it only takes one little mutation of an existing virus and BAM! – we’re history. ๐ฆ
๐ค
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