Awake Whilst Asleep

I surprises me to find that I’m just as messed up now as I was when I was a teenager. But it also pleases me to find that I have much the same spirit of adventure and creativity I had when I was a teen.

I don’t think that I’ll ever figure out what life is really about. There are just too many aspects for me to compute them all at once. Maybe I’ll work it out as I suck in my last breath – or maybe a moment (or so) after that air leaves my body – never to return.

I’m quite looking forward to dying – not that I want it to happen any time soon! It seems to me that it’ll be that last great adventure – the chance to know what no-one has been able to come back and tell us. I want to be awake and aware as I pass away. I want to train my mind to be able to process this information as it happens. I want to be capable of surviving it.

Strikes me that I’m not making much progress in this. I mean – I can’t even seem to persuade my conscious awareness to survive falling asleep, much less falling into the Big Sleep. I need to do more work. I need to be more aware of my depths. I need to be stronger.

I need to stop typing this now so that I can practice falling asleep whilst remaining aware of what’s around me.

Just another day at the office – right?

Waiting For Life To Happen

I think I get the sense (and it’s a character flaw I know) that I’m waiting for life to happen to me.

I’m also waiting for the editing of my novels to happen to me, the putting together of my Writing Tips book to happen to me and for everything important, generally, to happen to me.

Boy do I need a kick up the pants to happen to me!

The Secret Life of Pants

Secret Life of PantsExploring the world of underpants and their relation to mankind as revealed by the latest discoveries of scientists, The Secret Life of Pants includes remarkable information about pants as lie detectors and pants as ecological sentinels; it describes their ability to adapt to human wishes, their response to music, their curative powers, and their ability to communicate with man. Authors Peter Trumpkins and Christopher Cock suggest that the most far-reaching revolution of the 20th-century – one that could save or destroy the planet – may come from the garden of your bottom.

“Almost incredible … bristles with plenty of hard facts and astounding scientific and practical lore.”
 – S. K. Oberbuck, Nude-peek

“This fascinating book roams … over that marvellous no man’s land of mystical glimmerings into the nature of science and life itself.”
 – Henry C. Itch, Washington Post Boob World

“If I can’t ‘get inside her pants’ or ‘feel emanations’ from her pants and don’t know anyone else who can, that doesn’t detract one whit from the possibility that some people can and do. . . .
According to The Secret Life of Pants, pants and men do inter-relate, with pants exhibiting empathetic and spiritual relationships and showing reactions interpreted as demonstrating physical-force connections with men. As my students say, ‘hey, wow!’”
 – Calvin M. Klein, Professor of Bottoms, the University of Vermont (in Smithsonian)

Sunshine Blogger Award

Sunshine Blogger Award

I have won the Sunshine Blogger Award – yay!

Thanks to Jess, who nominated me at:

Here are my answers to the questions Jess gave me:

  1. What is the number one thing on your bucket list?
    Become a world famous author.
  2. How do you relax?
    Eat chocolate and meditate.
  3. What is bringing you the most stress right now?
    Answering questions like these. 🙂
  4. Would you rather be the best of the worst or the worst of the best?
    Oh, neither. I refuse to fall into such boxes. 😉
  5. How would you want to change the world?
    By writing interesting and informative stuff.
  6. What would you do if you couldn’t fail? (I like this question, thanks The Walk of Thoughts!)
    Succeed! 😀
  7. Do you fear judgement?
    Yes, sometimes. But only when I’m being bad. Generally.
  8. How do you deal with judgement?
    Do good things. 🙂
  9. What moment would you be happy reliving forever?
    None of them; that would be way too boring.
  10. Name 5 of your strengths that you’re proud of.
    Creativity, legs, writing, dream catching, ability to learn and willpower.
  11. What’s your favourite song from your favourite band?
    The one that springs to mind is Yellow by Coldplay, but there are lots and lots.

I’m not going to nominate anyone because I guess I have the perception that we’re all too stressed out trying to deal with what we already have on our plates, but thanks for nominating me, Jess – hope this is what you wanted.

The Dark Side


My favourite chocolate is Marks & Spencer Swiss Chocolate – specifically Extra Fine Milk. chocolateHowever, I understand that Dark Chocolate has more health benefits than Milk. So when I went to M&S an hour ago I bought one of each: 125g each of Milk and Dark (as you do).

Seems to me that the main differences are in the fat, sugar and fibre contents:

  • Dark chocolate has 24% more fat than Milk
  • Milk chocolate has 86% more sugar than Dark
  • Dark chocolate has 367% more fibre than Milk – yeah, nearly four times as much!

So – do I go for the fat, fibrous bar that will make me poo better or the sugary bar that makes my mood fluctuate like crazy?

For now it’s going to be one light, one dark, one light, one dark … let’s see how I go on with that.

You Are Valuable

Wriggle your toes.

Move your attention from your toes, along and up your feet until it reaches your ankles.

Slide up your shins slowly, feeling the shape of your bones until you reach up to your knees.

Then move upwards from your knees and onto the bare skin of your thighs, slowly, delicately feeling your skin as you do so, and as you reach the top of your thighs, pause and rest your attention on the sensitive skin at the junction of your legs.

For those of you who are new to this place, it is called private.

Only allow access to those people you can trust to protect and cherish your feelings.

You are valuable.