Mercy On Me

I can play guitar and I’m a whiz with computer programmes. I can walk and walk and not drop. If you were to teach me pretty much anything, I can learn it in a snap.

What I’m trying to say is that I’m reasonably smart. Certainly bright enough to tell the difference between my arse and my elbow. But still – there’s one thing I can’t understand. One thing that’s totally beyond my ability. One thing I can’t get my head around.

Know what that is? C’mon – have a guess. It’s something that’s pretty much everywhere in this world. You see them all over the shop. No way to escape them, even if you hiked up to the top of the highest peaks.

Got it?

Okay – I’ll tell you. It’s women.

I mean, what is it about these creatures that makes them so wonderful and yet so maddeningly frustrating at the same time?

Just when I think I’m winning on any particular day … I don’t know – everything seems to flip upside-down and the roof falls, plop, on my head. From a great height. Hard!

I’m totally baffled as to what to do on an hourly basis. Help!

So, if you know where there’s a User Manual for Women – have mercy on me – please let me have a copy! It’d sure be worth a pretty penny to me.

Any advice you can give would also be most welcome.