When all transmissions ceased from Swispon, we were sent to investigate. You must have read the official report by now and so I’ll skip the formal language and just tell it how it was. In short – every motherfrickin’ one of them was gone. All except one. And, in a sense, he was gone too.
When we boarded the island, the first thing we noticed was the incredible stillness and silence. Oh, sure – there were birds and stuff. Moor an island 200 metres up and you’re going to get that. But even they seemed subdued. The odd arcing flight across the sky; a tweet every now and again; but none of the massed alarm calls you usually get when humans get close to their nesting sites.
They’re still analysing the tomatoes but preliminary findings indicate that ingestion would have resulted in a transformatory effect that, in conjunction with the centrally issued radiation effect, would have produced a … something. And we have no idea what that ‘something’ is. Yet.
You’ll have read in the report that the generator was self-destructing so all we found there was a heap of slag. And the tomatoes were nano-engineered to self-decompose. It’s only because one of them malfunctioned, even after the robotic fail-safes had activated, that we have any clue at all as to what their function was.
You’ll read lots of guff in the infrazines about how the Japanese wouldn’t have been able to sustain the burden of what they did to their own country not to mention the embarrassment of living on hand-outs: food, money, land – that sort of thing. Shame seemed to be a big part of their makeup.
Like I say, there was only one guy left. His mental state is described as ‘precarious’, but it’s not as simple as him being mad. No-one can explain why there’s just a single person left. Fact is though – he’s not Japanese. He’s a Swiss national; a journalist who ‘inserted himself into Swispon’ to cover the inaugural 13th of June event: the ‘Ceremony of the Leaping Unknown’ as he translated it. The Japanese were not happy, but what could they do!
But getting him to explain what happened is proving impossible so far. We have the last email he sent, but apart from that – we can’t get a peep out of him. Okay, let me rephrase that: the only thing we can get out of him is peep. Specifically, bird noises. Sounds to us like he’s whistling up a storm.
And here’s the other funny thing. We looked at the last meal he ate. Heck, we looked at the last thing he shat too. The docs even wanted to cut him open and examine the contents of his intestines, but it seems that he still has rights – even if he can’t say nothing. Thing is, there was nothing strange about his last meal – apart from this: an apple.
He ate every last morsel of his room-service meal – looks like he even licked the plate, the slob; but not the apple. Thing is, I wouldn’t have eaten it either – it’s rotten to the core, but that’s not why he ignored it.
He has a red band on his wrist that says, in big yellow letters: extreme cyanide allergy. A joke, right? I thought so too until one of the techs told me that apple pips contain small amounts of cyanide. Not enough to kill you, except perhaps when you have an extreme allergy.
So, I’m listening to this guy peeping away as I’m transcorbing this message to you. And I’m wondering why the birds are so quiet and I’m thinking about how those tomatoes were meant to work and what the radiation was for and I’m darned if I can figure out where all the Japanese went. It’s a mystery – that’s what it is. But I’ll figure it out. Just give me some time.
Ugh; that apple just dissolved into mush. Right before my eyes. Imagine that!